Jordan Castro (b. 1992) is the author of poetry collections YOUNG AMERICANS (2013) and if i really wanted to feel happy, i'd feel happy already (2014), story collection Supercomputer (2011), and is 'widely published' on the internet.
I recently sent Jordan an email about doing this interview, and he was all for it. We discussed a few different topics over Gmail chat. This is the entire, unedited interview.
***
Jordan: yo
Jordan: going invis, but i'm here
damn, can't figure out invisible with new gmail thing
me: yeah its super confusing, I still haven't figured it out, but im ready whenever
Jordan: gimme a sec
me: alright
Jordan: actually all good
ready when you are
me: awesome man, well first off, thank u for doing this. I really appreciate it
Jordan: np
me: so first question: how old were u when u started writing poetry and how long did it take before u started to 'blow up' as a writer?
Jordan: i don't remember when exactly i started writing - i vaguely remember writing some rap songs in 3rd grade, and was the singer in a punk band when i was ~12 - but i think i started writing poetry when at ~14
i'm not sure that i've 'blown up' as a writer, but i got my first shit published when i was 16 and have just kind of been doing that ever since
me: what kind of things would u rap about as a 3rd grader?
Jordan: i don't remember... i think that was around the time when nelly's 'country grammar' dropped? ... and i was really into that. and ludacris' 'word of mouf,' so it was probably just some shit like that...
nothing real
Jordan: i remember writing an OGT (ohio stabndardized test thing) essay about how i was going to be a rapper when i grew up, and when i told my dad he said 'rap for me' and then layed in my bed while i meekly rapped what i could remember of 'lose yourself' by eminem...his feedback was something like 'you have to get more into it, you can't just stand there'
me: i remember trying to write Christian raps when i was ~8 y/o because i really liked Christian rap
Jordan: damn
Jordan: s/o my dad
'while we're at it'
love you dad
me: and u said u sang in a punk band at a relatively young age, and ive listened to a majority of what you've released on bandcamp. when did u start singing/playing instruments?
s/o my dad as well. stay strong pops
Jordan: my cousin played guitar and my brother played drums and they were jamming one day and told me i should sing, which i hadn't done previously to that... i went to my bedroom and got like, a political essay thing i wrote and just yelled some shit over a few chords or whatever
now i play a handful of instruments and write songs like, all the time, but haven't really released anything recently
i've been drumming in a band called Alone Alone (www.alonealone.
i've also been working on a record with sam pink called 'helping the police'
not sure when it's dropping
s/o sam pink
me: self taught or did u take lessons?
Jordan: i took guitar lessons for ~1 year then stopped
like lana says or whatever 'you've got the music in you, don't you' ... in her song... west coast? about me...
i feel like with writing and music and things it's just like, 'in me'...it's not really a choice or a learned thing. it's just something i have to do. like a form of therapy or something
me: i understand that. im also a musician and i write stuff, though ive only released electronic music and have sold rap beats. i think it can be very therapeutic
me: on a different topic now, how did u and tao lin meet, and were u a fan of his work before meeting him?
Jordan: i think me and tao met irl at some point in 2010? i don't remember exactly what happened but i remember he ordered 'think tank for human beings in general' - a split chapbook i self-published with richard wehrenberg jr. (of monster house press, s/o richard) - and i wrote him a note or something when i sent it
i was a fan of his writing before i knew him
tao's big homie though, s/o tao
me: im currently rereading 'taipei' and if im correct, the character calvin is a depiction of u, right?
Jordan: yes
me: how accurate is tao's depiction of u?
Jordan: i think accurate, in terms of like, those specific situations or whatever. tao works really hard and documents things in a manner i'm impressed with...i'm pretty sure there's a thing about like, where everyone was seated in the cab on the way to see xmen? i don't remember very much of those things, except for what we've all written about it, via drug use, or [something] ...
i recommend 'taipei,' for those who haven't read it,and encourage people to order it
going to pee, brb
Jordan: back
me: it is a truly great book, i remember reading it 3x before reading [whatever book i chose to read afterwards]. whens the last time u talked to/saw tao?
Jordan: our last emails are from june 27th, so like, a little less than a month ago?
i think the last time i saw him was when i read at the rap genius penthouse in manhattan a year or so ago
we* read
me: how's he been?
Jordan: i'd recommend emailing him, feel like it isn't really my business to share
me: i tried sending him an email recently, when i bought my ow copy of 'Taipei
me: *own copy of 'taipei' just saying that i loved it and stuff like that, to no response. figured he may be busy or probably receives a lot of emails from people he doesn't know, fans and stuff
me: but anyway, its been nearly two years of sobriety for u, and i saw that u are no longer a convicted felon. how are u feeling about that?
Jordan: i feel blessed, for real
waaay up i feel blessed
it's really insane how much better my life has been since i stopped doing dope and shit
just like
being able to be honest and trustworthy and a good friend, etc. to feel things other than dope sick or not dope sick, etc. the feeling of freedom is real and i'm grateful
s/o my bones who help me
to be honest though i don't think about it much anymore, i just try to keep my feet moving and stay grateful
Jordan: there is nothing, to me, as fulfilling as the relationships i have with people in my life right now. to sit and drink a cup of coffee on the porch with the dogs and some friends. it can be simple.
me: that's good man, im happy for u. i mean, im 16 years old, but ive had my issues with drugs and drinking, something ive only recently moved away from, and i understand the feeling of clarity and joy that comes with sobriety. it really is a great thing
Jordan: to be clear: i'm not like, 'against' drugs - i love them. i just, based on experience, can't use them in a manner that doesn't result in me being a hurtful unproductive fuckboy
me: i think i understand that. so now, when u look at things you've written in the past that included drugs, drinking, etc. how do u feel about it?
Jordan: i feel fine
i feel like, with writing or whatever, if i document things 'accurately,' or whatever, in an artistically satisfying manner, i .. [end thought]
i'm always changing, growing, [etc], so my writing will change too i guess
the goal is generally just to like, be real and [something], i don't know. again, it just feels more like i 'have to' than anything
going outside to smoke, might lose you, hopefully not
me: no worries man
Jordan: still there?
me: yes
Jordan: word
me: but anyway, yeah i understand that. i feel like regret, shame, guilt, etc. aren't very 'healthy' feelings, its good to just focus on where u are now and be real with yourself and everyone around you
Jordan: i don't know... i feel like... [something re feelings being feelings], and moving through them is an important part of being alive. even if they're 'unproductive' or 'unhealthy,' it's just a part of the whole deal
being real though, yeah
i just want to be a pretty hipster
real
me: well there aint nothing wrong with pretty hipsters
Jordan: when i die bury me inside the gucci store i guess
jk... re gucci store...
idk...
s/o mallory whitten
recommend her book, 'collected poems & stories'
me: how is Mallory?
Jordan: i recommend emailing her, feel like it isn't really my business to share
she's my sister though, i love her, s/o s/o s/o
Jordan: i have to go, thank you for interviewing me. going to plug some things then bounce
stacey lynn pickering and i have a chapbook coming out via monster house press titled 'conversations about love' (date TBA)
s/o canopy collective, an artist consignment store in cleveland
s/o all my friends, lovers, slimes, bones, etc
been working on a book of short fiction and a novel
me: alright man, thank u again for being apart of this, looking forward to all of the new stuff youre working on, looking forward to [hopefully] talking again soon, have a good one man
Jordan: you too, thank you
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